9 Easy Ways to Build your Child's Confidence and Self-Esteem

Feeling confident, capable and good about themselves...

When children have self-esteem they feel confident and capable and to put it simply they feel good about themselves.  Self-esteem is the measure of self-worth – how much we value ourselves.  A child with low self-esteem is often self-critical and hard on themselves and this can have a negative affect on performance at school not just academically but within friendship groups and how they behave.  No one likes to think of their child with low self-esteem and low confidence.  A child who is comfortable in their own skin will have a much better experience at school so it is really important to nurture our children’s confidence and self-esteem.

 9 Easy Ways to Build your Child's Confidence and Self-Esteem...

There are many things we can do to help nurture our child’s confidence and self-esteem.  Here, I explore some of them:

• Ask your child to find one thing they like about themselves – this is all about focusing on the positives! No matter how they feel, there is always one thing they can find to like about yourself. They could think about their sense of humour, a skill, or their friendly nature. Everyday try and think of more things they could add to the list and this will help to create a more positive image of themself.

• Change how they think – Encourage your child to try and understand why they sometimes focus on the negatives. If something happens that makes them have negative thoughts, ask them directly if they have done anything wrong. Sometimes things happen that are completely out of their control and have nothing to do with how they have acted. Even if they think they might have done something wrong, try and encourage them to think about what they would do differently next time to improve the outcome. Try and encourage them to think positively and take more time to notice when things go well. This will make them feel much better!

• Act like they are already confident – Encourage your child to practice acting like they already have confidence! For example, if they are shy, encourage them to talk to someone at school that they have never spoken to. Tell them it might seem daunting and scary at first but once they have done it that first time, they will slowly gain the confidence to do it again until it becomes natural to them.

• Be kind to others – Encourage your child to be kind. When they help others, it can make them feel like they are valued and appreciated. This all helps to improve their own self-worth and confidence. Encourage them to help a friend do something without being asked. If your child is old enough, volunteering for a charity can really help with this. It is also a good idea to spend more time with people who make them feel good, and less time with those who make them feel less confident about themselves.

• Healthy body, healthy mind – Encourage your child to look after themselves physically and mentally. Eating healthily and doing exercise can make a huge difference as they will naturally feel better and have more energy.

• Make them step out of their comfort zone - Each time your child tries something new they automatically are stepping outside of their comfort zone. If they try something new every day that they wouldn’t usually do, it can give them a boost that will certainly help to improve their confidence. Set themselves some goals and think of something they have always wanted to do, but not quite had the courage to try… and then do it!

• The power of music - It’s true when they say that music can have a powerful impact on us. If they begin to doubt themselves for any reason, try listening to songs that make them feel positive about themselves and their lives. It will lift their mood. Why not make a playlist for them?

• Write it down! - Sometimes it can help to get their feelings down into words or art. So if they are having a particularly down moment, then create an art box, or write down their feelings in a mood journal. Keeping track of how they are feeling and what the reasons might be is a great way to get their feelings out and not let bottled up.

• Tell someone - If they are struggling with regular negative feelings, then make sure they talk to someone they trust, you, a family member or teacher.

I hope all of these suggestions help you help your child to feel good about themselves and more confident.

I have recently been working on a number of new Mental Health and Wellbeing boxes and I’m really excited to announce that on Saturday 10^th October on World Mental Health Day I will be launching the range and included are my Confidence Cards, Self-Esteem Cards, Self-Care Cards and Kindness Cards. 

It is normal for children to go through ups and downs with their confidence and self-esteem, just as we adults do! We just need to be aware of this and be as supportive as we possibly can.